Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

The padd dropped from Julian's hand as he staggered back, gasping. 

Garak, for his part, hardly blinked. One learns, hemming trousers, not to react unless for effect. "Well," he said, "I'll take that as a no."

"Wh... what?"

"The enigma tale. The solution was not to your liking, I take it?"

"You kissed me!"

"Your powers of observation astonish me. Yes, just before the sun set. Forgive me for being romantic."

There it was, a sudden realization in his eyes. "Sun... kissed. Sunkissed. The murderer was sunburned. You kissed me as a hint?"

Garak allowed himself a smile. "What else?"

Nog beamed up at Jake, anticipation written all over his face. "Well? Did you figure it out?"

Jake shrugged. "Honestly... I don't know. I liked it," he added quickly. "But I don't get it."

"Don't worry!" Nog took the pad from Jake's hand, and began to flick through the pages. "Ferrengi murder mysteries are difficult. Let's add it all up. Start by looking at his assets, then compare-"

"No, I mean, I don't even get who the victim is."

"What do you mean? The money! He lost all his money, and the trick is to figure out how it happened." 

animal_lover_69:

Hello? Is anyone on?

disco_dancer:

Hi. How can I help?

animal_lover_69:

I was wondeing if you could provide me with some data on Cardassian biology. I have an unresponsive patient here and the database is scarce.

disco_dancer:

Of course. I am sending an overview right now.

disco_dancer:

Do you see it?

animal_lover_69:

Interesting.

disco_dancer:

?

animal_lover_69:

It seems we might be talking from different times. Is this safe?

disco_dancer:

Huh. I’m not sure. Let me ask my boyfriend. Brb.

animal_lover_69:

My patient’s communication device is beeping.

disco_dancer:

I will kill him. Keep him alive before I do. I’m out.

Slowly, Garak ran a hand along the elongated skull of the Brachiosaurus. "What a surprisingly elegant creature. The neck is particularly impressive."

Julian tried to hide his amusement. "You think so?"

"Oh," Garak chided, gently, "don't give me that look. I'm well aware that humans consider my kind to be - what is the term?" Before Julian could interject, he continued "lizards."

"That isn't what-" Julian stuttered, helplessly looking around for something to distract them both, "I mean, I didn't bring you here to-"

"Such an interesting museum, though." Garak let him stew. "What an interesting idea for a first date."

It was the first question anyone ever asked him, and Odo tried not to take it personally. Still, he could not repress a twitch of indignation.

"You came back?" It was Julian this time, blinking stupidly in the soft light of the sick bay.

"Should I not have?"

Julian frowned, then smiled, then frowed again. "I'm happy to see you, of course!"

Odo rumbled in amusement. "But?"

"Well... The Great Link is supposed to be... Paradise. Unlimited, endless joy and community. Why give that up?"

Hearing footsteps approaching, Odo closed his eyes. He'd know her anywhere. "It has its limits."

The earplugs had definitely not been an overreaction.

When you said their language was musical, Kira signed to Jadzia, I thought you meant metaphorically.

One of the many-colored aliens, whose name was a long and complex melody in three-parts harmony, sang a greeting. Nope, Jadzia signed. This is why we put them in a sound proofed room..

And why they asked specifically for officers who speak universal sign to attend..

Jadzia grinned, grabbing a drink from a passing tray.

I like it, Kira said, after a moment. With the earplugs, it was soft, almost flowing. A river, washing over her.

Kira tried to pinpoint the exact moment, when the bickering turned into a brawl.
„I’ll let you know, that I’m a bit of a heartbreaker myself.“
Perhaps it was when Dukat opened his mouth.
„Really? I could have sworn you proclaimed yourself a family man just hours ago. A bit of a contradiction, don’t you think, Dukat?“
Or when Garak couldn’t help but chime in.
„A family man can have his pleasures. Something you wouldn’t know – you have no family and no pleasure whatsoever.“
„I certainly have that in common with your women.“
In hindsight, it wasn’t really that difficult.

Julian ran into the café and threw himself across Jadzia's table, eyes wild. "Do you speak Ferrengi?"

"Good morning to you, too!"

"Sorry," he wheezed, "it's important. I overheard Quark talking to Garak about his silent partner."

Jadzia frowned. "Like... business partner?"

"Yes! That's what Quark said, I think. I can't be sure; the universal translator gave me a target language conflict error." He lowered his voice. "Apparently, they're right here on this station."

"Uh, sure, I know a little..." Julian handed her the translator log, and Jadzia burst out laughing.

"Well?"

"Julian... that's Ferrengi slang for intimate male companion."

The room smelled like a damp basement, and not in a good way. Quark shifted in his chair; the back was too straight for comfort, undoubtedly by design.

"I shouldn't be here!" He glared at the tray the demurely naked attendant was holding.

"It's all natural" the attendant wiggled the tray, her bangles jangling, "Kelda bark."

"It's just tradition." The doctor had entered behind him. Quark resisted the urge to turn and look. "Not to worry; we're a science based treatment facility."

"This is some sort of mistake!"

"Just relax. We'll have this... generosity of yours cured in no time."

The promenade was packed – Quark’s was hosting a party. Garak didn’t plan to attend, but taking an evening stroll was not a crime. Yet.
He stopped in his tracks. „What do I spy with my little blue eye?“
„Good evening, Garak!“ Bashir looked very happy, when he approached. „Care for a dance?“
„Oh, I am sure I can’t, doctor. I am not dressed for the occassion.“
„You’re fine!“ Julian was wearing a sparkly holographic suit, so tight it could have easily been a leotard. „Come. I am the best disco dancer in this quadrant. You don’t want to miss it.“